Monday, May 7, 2007

...

I really really want to write something here today, but my mind is too crowded. I am trying best to concentrate on one subject, but there is just too many things in my mind. Or may be there is nothing in my mind right now..i don't know what is true. may be I am thinking too much.

I don't feel that good today. Its 3:42 am and although sleepy, I don't want to go to bed. I have nothing to do...but I don't want to go to bed. I am afraid, I may not get asleep soon...afraid, I might start to think about the things, I don't want to think about right now.

There is a storm outside. The wind, the rain...they are making strange noises. Back in the home, I would be enjoying them. I used to love it when it rained. I would go to the roof of my house to catch the rain. I would my room's windows to let the wind come inside. But here,...they scare me. Wind...leave me alone.

Alone. I am not alone. I have friends here, whom I have known for more than 4 months now. These are good bunch of peoples you know. You may not know this, coz' you have never met them. But as I said, I have been living with them for four months and these are good people. So i am not really alone...but I am definitely lonely, lonely as hell.

Let me ask you a question. Just after you get awake in the morning, before you get up from the bed, what do you think about? Do you think about all the things that you will do in this new day. Do you think like...hmmm...what is one good thing that will happen today? when will I smile today? When will I feel good today? If you do think like this, what will you do if you have nothing to hope for? nothing to expect...

Well you just get up anyways and start to brush your teeth right? Thats exactly what I do here. Every freaking day...I get up and brush my teeth.

10 comments:

A said...

खै के भन्ने प्राय सबैको यौतै छ कथा; अब दोष त हाम्रै हो एक् प्रकारले नेपालमा बस्दा बिदेशिने नपाउने कि भन्ने अब बिदेशमा एक्लो भो भनेर कस्लाई सुनाउने
होप् यु विल् गेत् युज्ड् तु ईत् सुन्
अर् होप् यु विल् बी यबल् तु फाइन्ड् सम् नाइस् कम्पनी

Samyak said...

As I said, I am aong nice people, its just that I dont feel nice...

I was too sleepy that day...sorry about all the rambling

Chhakku Pakku said...

why dont u brush your teeth before going to bed?

its good for the change!
:)


btw, feel close to ur friends - here or there - anywhere - everywhere; bcos feeling is more persistent than physique. If u feel glad u r glad, if u feel lonely u r lonely.
so buddy, hang on, feel happy
but dont ask me how :(

Samyak said...

Thats the problem sathi...no one knows how to do that

nabrz said...

it's very easy ... ask me :)

Samyak said...

OK.
so I am asking you. tell us how we to feel happy.

udayan said...

to feel happy, it's as simple as this..

DON'T FEEL UNHAPPY!
:-)

Samyak said...

Easy said than done, don't you think?

nabrz said...

i agree with udayan..
if you still feeling unhappy then
buy return ticket.. come here... i will tell you :)

udayan said...

see, here comes the agreement...

if you think it's easy said than done, they why don't you do the easy thing? just SAY IT! and SAY IT!..and you'll be happy.., there's nothing more you need to do.

Cheers!